“Getting discouraged is easy. There are negative people all around us, and it’s hard to pick out which ones are being constructive and honest versus those who are being jerks. What I find interesting is just how easy it is to let their opinion scuttle my mood for a while. That’s sure a lot of power I’m giving them.” – Chris Brogan

“You’re a deadbeat.”

The words stunned me. I felt my chest cave in, as if I’d been punched. My stomach turned. I cringed.

I don’t have the poker face talent, so I’m sure the look on my face was evidence of how deeply that comment stung—how badly I was hurt.

Fighting back the tears, I smiled and walked away.

Wow.

A deadbeat? Because I’m a freelancer? Really?

I’m not sure why this particular incident cut me so deeply. Of course, over the past few years, I’ve encountered various people (both in real life and in cyber world) who simply don’t understand how much hard work freelancing truly is.

For the most part, I ignore the hurtful remarks and carry on.

But this time was different. And I know part of the reason is because of who those words came from.

As I shared this episode with a few friends, the kind words, compliments, and encouragement began to cascade over me – freelancing friends are the best!

And one friend mentioned that I had given those words too much power over me; that if I didn’t believe in my heart that it was true to some extent – at least part of me, anyway – than it wouldn’t have hurt so badly.

I think she must be right.

Have I allowed my self-confidence to diminish? Has my once-chin-up attitude been beaten down? Am I so discouraged from life and everyone’s judgments, that I’ve started believing what they say about me?

Surely not!

5 Tips for Dealing with Rude Remarks & Negative Opinions

1. Don’t take it to heart. Even if you’re super tender-hearted like I am, you need to train yourself to deal with these situations – they will most likely happen.
2. Ignore them. Just because someone is rude, opinionated, and gives no thought to how you feel, and don’t know your situation or how hard you work, doesn’t mean you have to respond at all. Sometimes the best response is simply none.
3. Draw from your reservoir of strength. It’s there, deep inside. Tap in to it and feel the reassurance sweep over you!
4. Show, don’t tell. There are some people, who no matter how long you talk to them, will never understand what a freelancer does. Simple as that. So, quit talking and just let your life and work speak for itself. When you’re actually living and buying things (whether it’s food, clothes, cars, or are earning enough freelancing to pay a hefty mortgage and support the entire household) people will begin to see that you are indeed making money from that little computer you stare at day-after-day!
5. Move on. Life is too short to allow negativity to weigh us down and keep us from being happy, at peace, and from our work!

I’ll admit. This particular incident upset me much more than I’d have liked it to. But I know deep in my heart that these people simply do not understand how many hats a freelancer wears. I remind myself of that—sometimes daily.

As I remind myself and struggle to let go, a new day begins. I wake up, proud to be a freelancer.

Have you been mocked because you don’t have a “real job” and just “play on the computer all day”? And if so, how did you react? What is your advice on handling these situations? Does it really get to you? How did you turn that negative situation in to a positive?