Articles archived for November 2009
These weeks leading up to Christmas seem to always devolve into chaos. Have you been struggling to keep your life and work in balance? With the mayhem around me growing increasingly frustrating I dug back through my archives for a piece I remembered writing in March of 2007. We had survived the holiday upheavals, the kids had gone back to school and life was falling back into some semblance of order.
I need to remember how I accomplished that. How did I keep my mother-writer aspects from overpowering me? I’m sure many of you, even those who aren’t mothers (Hey writer-dads!) or parents are feeling the strain as they try to co-ordinate their work, their family, and their social lives. So, the wisdom of nearly three years comes to surface again.
Are you a Writer-Dad? I’d love to share a male perspective of the work-from-home challenge. Please share your comment or consider contributing your own post to WRA.
As a mother of two and a full-time writer, I understand how challenging it can be to have two very intense careers and try to blend them together. Women are remarkable beings, capable of doing multiple things. They have the ability to nurture a sick child and an infant novel at the same time.
When it comes to being a mother, there is more involved than making sure the children don’t drown in the bathtub or burn themselves on a hot stove. Parenting includes house work, entertaining, educating, doctoring, supervision and management, social administration, courier services, dressmaking, hairdressing, sanitation monitoring, nutritional advise and chef… The list could go on and on. Only a parent could possibly understand everything that goes into the day to day living of raising little people.
Writing is an equally busy and time consuming career. As a parent, especially a single mother, it’s impossible to disappear into the study for hours and surface with bags under our eyes, coffee-stained teeth, frazzled hair and a satisfied, although exhausted, smile on our faces. Writing time involves rare snippets between kissing boo-boos, getting kids to school, cooking dinner, and changing diapers.
Being a writer and being a mother require many of the same skills. The most important elements to make a successful mother/writer are imagination, creativity, intuition, patience, and understanding. It’s also vital to have a fantastic sense of self-worth. Without it you will constantly find the family’s slightest needs come before your writing. Understanding the value of what you do and being able to remember why you love it and why it’s worth making sacrifices is vital.
A few tips to remember:
- Develop a Routine!
If you have set times dedicated to meals, housework, homework, baths, and bed you are a huge step toward minimal chaos in your home and work life. Routine can go a step further than this and create a greater sense of calm if you also plan your writing times to suit your average day. I schedule a few hours each night, after tucking kids into bed, to write. This is the pen-to-paper (or words-to-screen) writing that involves concentration and focus. Research, planning, listing, plotting, chatting, character development, reviewing, editing, and short pieces can be slotted in at other times during the day but you need to have a set time dedicated to your writing regularly (daily if possible). - Be Flexible!
While you have a routine it’s important to know how to bend the rules a little. Things are going to come up that you hadn’t planned for. You need to be able to bend your routine and schedule to suit. If the school calls up because your daughter is sick you slot a doctor visit into your afternoon and adjust your writing tasks. If your three-year-old got creative while you both cooked lunch together and is covered in flour you need to fit a bath in before you eat. Raising children, without going insane, requires flexibility. - Learn to Prioritize!
Know that some stages need to be completed before others. Make sure writing is one of your high priorities but forgive yourself if you have to take the night off to attend your son’s soccer game (you could schedule that in), or daughter’s dance recital. Understand that changing a dirty diaper has an immediate deadline and your article due tomorrow can wait the few minutes it takes to change the diaper. Do the projects that are most important first and don’t leave things to the last minute. - Keep Lists!
Shopping lists, project lists, idea lists, activity lists, school friends’ names, books borrowed from the library, actions to take for this or that article, character traits from your current novel, markets, budgets… The list of lists can be fairly endless but they are a great way to stay present with every aspect of your life. As a mother you’re going to be in multiple places at once in your mind. It creates a jumble to your memory functions. Lists help us keep information near to hand and jotting a list helps us remember. - Love what you do!
Whatever it is you’re doing at any given moment, LOVE doing it! It’s the only way to stay sane when you have to shift from task to task. Remember that everything you do serves an important purpose. Spending time with your children and your home reinforces a sacred bond and keeps you connected with the most important aspects of life. Every moment is precious, and no matter what you are doing, love being alive in that moment and know that every step is toward a brighter future.
The final thing to remember is to ‘communicate‘. Tell your loved ones what you need from them. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Share yourself, your dreams and ambitions, cry on a friend’s shoulder when it gets hard, leave the kids with a baby-sitter and go out for a night on the town with your girlfriends, give your heart and mind to others with commitment and honesty. Tell yourself, others and the universe what it is you want with confidence. When you do, you’ll find the world acting to accommodate you.
Being a writer and a parent is not impossible. You will learn more tips and tricks as you do it day to day. You will come to understand what works for you and what doesn’t. Try everything and learn to adapt to the needs of your unique family.
It’s challenging but also very exciting. You gain so much from sharing your life with children and with writing. You can touch the world, change people, create life and inspire others and truly love yourself doing it. Smile, stand up tall and proud, and truly realize how amazing and incredible you are. Live it, love it, and write about it.
Originally published on Writing.Com. Reprinted for Write-From-Home and Helium.
What tips can you share about how you keep the your writing life in balance with your other hats?
My writing career has crossed over – I’m now making close to a full-time living as a blogger. That doesn’t mean I’ve given up other writing (not at all!) But I’m making as much blogging as I did as an editorial assistant back in the day — enough for some people to live on, but not me.
With 12 blogs to write each week, I have almost-daily deadlines, creating the frenetic pace of a newspaper for me some mornings.
How do I keep track of it all?
I took a tip from my magazine editing days and created an editorial calendar. Some publishing houses call it a map, others an outline. Whatever you call it, an editorial calendar is a list of topics to be covered.
An editorial calendar for a monthly publication tells editors what to assign; it tells the sales department how they can best sell ads for each issue; and it helps all departments keep everything straight. For instance, my editorial calendar for RECON: The Magazine of Woods Paintball may have included an article on using handheld radios on the paintball field. Our sales department would want to call Motorola and give them a heads-up about it.
How do you keep an editorial calendar for blogging?
My calendar, right now, goes three months out. On my calendar for each day, I write the name of the blog and the topic to be covered. A typical entry for Monday, then, when I write for Freelance Writing Jobs and Babies Online, may look like this:
Monday: FWJ: The Cat Ate My Laptop: How to Kill Your Freelance Career
Babies Online: Whiskey: The Best Way to Get Baby to Sleep through the Night
(Note: These are not really blog titles!)
On Wednesday, I do my writing for AllReviews.com, which includes four blogs about baby gear and one about paintball products, so I won’t bore you with titles.
On Thursday, it’s FWJ and BOL again. Then, on Friday, I write for Long Island Exchange. Again, I always jot down a particular title or idea. For instance, with the holidays coming, I have scheduled a few techie gift guides for Long Island Exchange and suggestions for shopping on Cyber Monday.
On my hard-copy calendar page or in the Google Calendar, I include any links to resources I may have found. One day I will upload a productivity app on my iPod Touch and be totally mobile.
If a lead or cool sentence pops into my head, I jot it down as a prompt on either calendar. Eventually (again), I’ll have a whiteboard hung in my office where I can keep all my ideas in front of me all month long.
With ideas scheduled through February, I no longer have to worry about what I’m going to write. Because I have a loose outline, I’ll frequently come across resources that will help me, and I can write them down as I find them.
Keep it flexible
A blogging editorial calendar offers flexibility you may not get with print magazines. With print publications, your editorial calendar will often be printed and distributed to advertisers. To go back to my original example, if I decided to drop that handheld radio story at the last minute, I’d have a very angry sales department on my hands.
In most cases, blogs make money in other ways and sales people don’t pound the pavement to sell ad pages based on upcoming content. If news of a big research study involving babies and travel breaks on Monday morning, I can postpone my original Babies Online  idea and cover the late-breaking news. If I come across a grammatical error that really gets me peeved, I can write about what inspires me and save the idea on the calendar for another day. Maybe I’ll even write both posts and schedule one to publish later in the week. Ah, the freedom of blogging for a living!
While the U.S. celebrates a remarkable moment in their history, Thankgiving offers an opportunity for everyone around the world to remember the importance of gratitude. For what are you most thankful?
With just a few weeks of school before the holiday season is truly upon us I look around myself today and appreciate the true wonders and joy in my life. From the smiling faces of my children and the tight knit of my loving family to the simpler things like food on our table and a roof over our heads. There are so many things to be grateful for in each and every day.
As writers, we are gifted with expressive voice. Every word we place on the page has meaning and purpose, each sentence expresses an idea. Every story we tell, be it fiction or non-fiction, has a message, something rich and meaningful that our readers take with them when the story is read. Consider, as the holidays approach, including the message of gratitude in your writing.
How can we express gratitude in every moment? Begin, by being truly thankful for the opportunity to be who you are, a writer. Your gift is unique and precious. I give thanks that we might share our gifts with each other.
Tired of spending endless hours staring at a blank page? Exhausted and feel like your brain has somehow mysteriously been kidnapped and turned into a gooey, soft mush? Can’t focus? Not able to think clearly? Have trouble remembering how to spell the simple stuff you know by heart?
You’re probably suffering not only from MJSS, but from lack of nutrition. I touched lightly on eating in my post: Natural, Zen Remedies for MJSS but I’d like to share a little more detail on this topic because I truly believe a lot of freelancers out there are struggling, trying desperately to scrounge up some brain power. And, for that, I give you…
Food for Thought
Eating is a very important part of life. Eat too much and you feel bloated, sick, and lethargic. Eat too little and you’ll end up weak, foggy, and unable to concentrate. Eat too much – or only – the wrong foods, and you’ll more than likely be out of sorts totally!
It’s amazing what a difference I feel overall when I’m bombarding my body with fresh, raw juices, smoothies, veggies, fruits, nuts, and seeds. When I allow too many non-raw foods (especially any processed ones) into my diet I pay for it, both in body, and in mental clarity – or lack thereof.
You don’t have to stop enjoying all your favorite (even junk) foods to achieve the enhanced focus and inspiration you’re craving. Just a few minor changes to your daily lifestyle can make all the difference in your freelance life. Really.
Fuel Your Freelance Business
Let me guess: You work long, crazy hours. Am I right? You forget to eat – or you nibble on donuts, chips, or chocolate while you sit all those hours staring at the computer screen. True, no?
Try the following tips for extra nutrition, strength, and motivation. You might just be surprised how much you accomplish!
Freelance-Friendly Fuel Tips
- Instead of racing to the computer when you first wake up of the morning, race to the kitchen. Drink some water and if you’re not one to fuss over a fancy breakfast, just grab a piece of fruit, make a bowl of oatmeal, or whip yourself up a yummy fruit smoothie.
- Don’t run to your office – or corner – just yet. Prepare for the work day by portioning yourself some nuts and/or seeds for a snack. Nuts and seeds are not only delicious and filling, they’re filled with protein and other nutrients your body – and your brain – will gobble up.
- Keep a fresh glass of water within reach so you’ll stay hydrated. Drinking plenty of water can also help prevent you from craving the wrong kinds of foods as well.
- Make snacks and/or meals ahead of time. If you do that, you’re less likely to order take-out like pizza or pasta and you’re more likely to fill up on healthier options throughout the day.
- Try practicing a few minutes (as little as 10 minutes!) of yoga each morning before you begin your work day, or to relax and stretch yourself during the day. Many people who begin practicing yoga fairly regularly notice an improved change in their eating habits, energy, and brain functions.
These tips will not only keep your body fueled, but your mind rarin’ to go and your freelance goals on target. So you see, the best way to fuel your freelance business (aka bring in the money and success!) is to fuel your brain by feeding your body. What are you waiting for? Grab some healthy snacks, guzzle some water, and get busy doing what you do best: fill that blank page!
Did you enjoy this article? Feel free to visit the other articles Michele has written for Writer’s Round-About–or contact her to write for you.
Do you apply any of these tips to your day-to-day freelance routine? Do you have anything extra to add, that I’ve forgotten? How to you fuel your brain so you can fuel your freelance business? Let’s discuss and glean from each other!
Have you ever wished you could let your friends and followers know when you’ve published a new post without having to traverse your several favored social networks? It usually takes me about 10 minutes to cross post quick updates to my SocNets whenever I want to let people know a new post has gone up on WRA. But what happens when a new post goes up that was scheduled? I’m not sitting at my computer ready to spread the word!
That’s where Shorten2Ping comes in.
This nifty WordPress plugin says, “Hey Ping.fm got something for you!” It uses your settings to tell Ping.fm (Michele Tune told us all about Ping.FM and why you will love it!) exactly what you’d like to say and then Ping.fm does the work of letting all your friends know. The greatest thing is it does it automatically. Now you’ve got no excuse for forgetting to let me know you’ve updated your blog.
Once you’ve got Shorten2Ping set up correctly you can save yourself those precious 10 minutes and let Shorten2Ping and Ping.fm do the hard work. Every time a post is published on your blog it’ll ping itself through your social networks automatically and you can get on with the important things, like writing MORE new posts.
Have you ever wanted to do something with your WordPress blog but don’t know how? Feel free to ask and I’ll dig up a solution for you. Do you use or prefer a different plugin to update your social networks? I’d love to explore other options too so share, shout, and keep on spreading the word.
Oh! By the way, if you want to know whenever Writer’s Round-About is updated (or I have something at least semi-interesting to say) you can follow @laffarsmith on Twitter and if you Subscribe via RSS you’ll never miss a post.
After you’ve read all these do’s and don’ts, you’ll probably be feeling like you’ve just received a lecture from your glaring parent. Okay, not really. I’m much more lighthearted than that!
But, seriously, there is a way to approach Social Media and there are definitely things you want to avoid as you brave the Social Media waters.
It can seem scary, but it’s not as bad as you think. Don’t worry about it so much that you don’t enjoy the experience, but do worry (in a healthy way) about presenting yourself in a professional manner.
For instance, you can share something fun, while maintaining your professionalism in every way. You don’t have to get rude, defensive, or vulgar to gain a following and become one of the “popular kids in school.â€
Following are some things to consider as you mingle the online social scene, attempting to become a Social Media butterfly.
A Few Do’s and Don’ts of Social Media
Do share your personality.
Don’t share what color of underwear you’re wearing.
Do update often.
Don’t update so often that people feel overwhelmed and unfriend you.
Do be honest.
Don’t tell everything you know.
Do share tips to help others.
Don’t give away all your secrets.
Do be helpful.
Don’t help so much that you overextend yourself – you’ll burn out.
Do promote your business.
Don’t make it your primary purpose—Social Media is NOT a one-way street.
Two Ways is the Right Way
And that last don’t is one I’ve seen a lot on the various Social Media sites. I’ve seen accounts where the entire time the person has been there, they’ve promoted their own articles, products, or services. Where’s the “social†part of that?
Social Media is like gift giving. It’s about giving and taking. And remember the old adage: It’s better to give than it is to receive.
I do promote my articles, reviews, blog posts, and contests often on several different Social Media sites. That’s one of the reasons I went ahead and signed up for ping.fm. But I promote others way more than I promote myself.
I share quotes and other people’s articles, blog posts, or reviews/contests because I feel they provide solid value to my followers/friends/readers and because I consider the person/business I’m promoting to be a genuine source.
It’s very easy to get caught up in the taking aspect of Social Media. Don’t be one of those people who only think of themselves. Put others before yourself and you’ll be respected for that. Don’t do it simply because I’m recommending it – do it because you genuinely understand the theory and because you have a desire to approach Social Media in the best way possible.
Do I have all the Social Media answers? No. Do I have a million followers already? No. But the followers/friends I do have at this point know that I’m real. And they know I’m not all about me.
Social Media is a two-way street. Balance out the traffic flow and remember, it’s okay to “pull over” and let someone go around you sometimes. You’ll definitely find great pleasure in gleaning and passing on wisdom from others. I know I do.
Did you enjoy this article? Feel free to visit the other articles Michele has written for Writer’s Round-About–or contact her to write for you.
Are you active in Social Media? What’s your favorite? Do you promote others? Do you learn from the wisdom flying across the networks? Do you promote your work often, or not at all? Let’s talk!
Photo Credit: brokenarts
As freelance writers, a large part of our business comes from connecting with others. In fact, while many of us begin by trawling the job boards we eventually find word-of-mouth brings at least 80% of our clients hammering on our front door. It is important to socialize and be active in the community, both online and off, but how is it done?
I’m not sure if you’re aware of it, but I suffer from social phobia. For those who aren’t familiar with the term, social phobia is a fear of people, social situations, or the judgment of others. It goes beyond mearly being shy to full-out anxiety attack with all the nasty side effects. My fear of people and social situations has left me feeling like I’m at a disadvantage when networking and building my business. The truth is, I don’t KNOW what I think most would consider common social niceties. So, I’m turning to you, can you help me?
I recently read a fantastic blog post and enjoyed the voice and dynamic of the author, Jay Baer. Being web savvy and a social media expert he provided several methods to connect and keep in touch. But, what is the social etiquette when it comes to introducing yourself to a stranger?
- How do you approach someone who has never heard of you?
- How do you introduce yourself?
- What do you say on first meeting someone?
- What would be considered rude or inappropriate?
- If you have a mutual friend should you wait, or ask, to be introduced?
- How do you establish a footing for new friendship?
- Do/Should you introduce yourself in blog comments?
- Do others feel frustrated having strangers introduce themselves (like movie-stars constantly hounded for autographs)?
- Do you introduce yourself when you follow someone on Twitter?
- Do you beg and borrow friends from your other Plurk buddies?
- How do you ask to connect with someone on LinkedIn?
- Do you attach a private message to your Facebook friend request?
- How do you build your network if you’re chronically shy?
As you can see, I have many questions and these only begin to scratch the surface. So, I’ll put them to you and I hope you can help me.
How do YOU meet and greet new people?
It has happened to me hundreds of times. My schedule is clear, children are occupied, housework is caught up, and suddenly my writing time flops because I don’t know how to start. Starting is necessary to reach a finished article, short story, poem or novel. In order to write, you must practice writing on a regular basis. Inspiring writing comes with routine, innovation, and determination.
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Writing Bursts
Ban together with fellow writers and have a writing burst. Twenty to thirty minutes of free writing will loosen the words – and your fingers – while building the creative juices.
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Musical Melodies
Playing a music selection during your writing time will help train your body to write during those same melodies. Music will also create a white noise, blending all the distracting sounds. A particular music selection can also bring back the inspiration of a particular story if you stop the tract when it becomes necessary to move onto other scheduled items.
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Lists
Writing out your lists for the day, including to-do’s, shopping, bills, and chores will allow you the opportunity to clear your mind of those tasks and focus on what you have set down to do during your writing time.
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Scheduling
It is not only important, but vital to a writer’s life to schedule your day around the time you write, not the other way around. If you are trying to take care of life first and fail to nurture the writer within you, the writer within you will fail to perform when time comes.
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Taking the phone off the hook
Yes, I absolutely mean that. The phone can be a major distraction. Friends and family call when they feel the need to share a funny story or complain about the clerk at the store forgetting to give change. There is no use in telling anyone to call you x many times in a row if it is an emergency. There will always be one person who believes the clogged sink is worth interrupting you. Unless you are a plumber and are able to snake a drain, it is NOT important.
You have the choice
each day
to nurture the creativity within
or to allow every other aspect in life
control your time to write.
What ways do you nurture the muse that inspires your words?
How do you block out the unnecessary to perform the necessary?
Musicians do not appear on stage to perform without hours of previous practice. Dancers learn their choreography in the studio before they dance for the public. Singers do scales. Athletes stretch. Writers need to light their Creative Fires and maintain their Creative Flow too.
Writers need to write – often, regularly, for all kinds of reasons.
Last night I handed out the following list to my Write with Spirit class. I asked everyone to consider why they write. It helps to know. In fact setting your intention for writing with a specific purpose in mind harnesses the creative forces of the universe on your behalf. Often we are wishy-washy. We want to write to educate and we end up writing to soothe ourselves. Both are important and valuable – yet require different attention from us.
- Write to Free Your Creativity – You want to live a creative life and writing is one way to do that.
- Write for Wholeness – You want to develop, deepen and expand your connection with your Higher Self.
- Write for Guidance – You want to receive guidance from your Higher Self.
- Write for Insight and Understanding – You want to broaden your perspective and see through the eyes of Spirit
- Write for Personal Growth – You want to experience more personal balance, alignment, and calm. You want to know your authentic feelings and needs better. You want to learn and grow
- Write to Heal – You know writing offers you a path through confusion to clarity, through sadness, depression and fear into hope, appreciation and forgiveness.
- Write for Relief – You want to step outside of your small mind, find comfort, soothe yourself.
- Write for Joy – You write because it is fun and you love doing it! You reach for to experience the joy of “Dancing with the Universe.
- Write to Deliver a Message – You have something to say and you want to teach, share, educate.
- Write to Entertain – You want your words to provide delight, humor, intrigue, drama or fun for others
- Write to Inspire – You want your words to help others to wake up to their own Magnificence.
- Write to Connect, Move, Touch – You want to touch hearts, provide comfort, romance, ease, and hope.
The next time you sit down to write consider your intention before you begin:
When you write with a destination in mind you are more likely to get where you are going. Just do not forget to include regular writing practice in your schedule. Writers do need to write.
Do you Love to Write? Join me for Write with Spirit classes from the comfort of your own home. Email me for a link to current events peri@creatorschoice.com
Enjoy my Write with Spirit Blog http://www.writewithspirit.blogspot.com/ and sign up at my website to receive my ezine http://www.creatorschoice.com
I’m all about celebrating your creative spirit with Writing Practice Tips, Positive Partnership Skills and anything else that inspires and engages hearts. I enjoy personal contact with my readers so feel free to contact me directly. Thanks for being YOU!
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Do you need help discovering your passion, motivation, or true purpose? Perhaps you need a Date With Destiny. Join inspirational life coach, Tony Robbins, this December!
In the video below, Elizabeth Gilbert, author of “Eat, Pray, Love“, shares the greatest rule for artistic success, Show Up For The Job!
As writers, we struggle against inspiration and creativity but can we truly know the source of insight and ideas? Our job is to show up, hands on keys or pen on page, be there, each day and perform the act of writing; participate in the process. We can’t control the quality of our creativity, we can’t control how receptive to our thoughts readers will be or which novel makes it to the best seller lists and which don’t. Our part of the process is to show up at the keyboard and get the words on the page.
Listen as Elizabeth discusses the importance of nurturing creativity and trusting the “genius” that exists outside of ourselves, and in putting aside fear to do the job.
What are your thoughts about what Elizabeth has shared? Do you feel creativity is an external power? Where do you think your own creativity comes from?
